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Heads up. Grab a change of clothes cause Thirsty Media's new issue for October is fresh out. I have a featured column entitled: Terminal Evolution and Insect Context.
I also have a review of the new Wolf Eyes and Current 93 albums, and a write up of the New Japanese Music Festival. Give it the old check out. It's a great little publication with a bunch of good people behind it. Read the October Issue and see Rome before you die of boredom.
more dispatches from heaven
Our old pal Pastor Rodge has illumited us with another heavenly nugget of biblical-biological salvation.
This was back before they tested for AIDS and Hepatitis B and stuff.
pervious words from the good Pastor
Thanks Ma.
Previous to going down hard, we at YTM were customers of Namesecure.com
Yeah, them.
We have presently moved on. Our youthful naivete has been displaced by gobs and gobs and gobs and gobs of hard calcified knowledge. We are geniuses now. Namesecure is not. A week after YTM went away, and two automated tech support e-mails from namesecure later, I received this lovely SPAM e-mail:
De valued customer,
This is an e-mail to let you know that a week ago, we are going to be deleting your hosting account from namesecure.com. because it will have expired by then. At this point you should have received no notification of it's pending expiration, or our intent to delete it, but in the past it will have been removed. Thank you for any inconvenience this may have caused you. We hope that you have taken this time a week ago to back all of your data up. We hope to continue offering you the best products on the internet. Here is a link to where you can purchase a new hosting account with namesecure.com Link.
Fuck you for your patronage.
P.S. Please do not respond to this e-mail. We wont receive it. Also you cannot call us because we don't have a phone. Sorry.
P.P.S. Namesecure.com is no longer run by humans. It's incredible customer service is a result of randomly coded chance. Happy Birthday!
note:this is not the actual e-mail I received, the actual e-mail did not use the word "data".
So we have switched hosts. Hopefully we can all look forward to more uninterrupted bim-bam yo-blastin in the future from your friends at YTM
Regards,
The Young Team Management
WEEERE BACK! We're going to be in the process of slowly recovering from our loss. Also I cleaned my room. Have the fun.
Regards,
-The Young Team Management
If the "Nouns on a Thing" series of movies ever becomes reality, and not just something we find hillarious, I will start my own space program to get myself the fuck out of here. Sure, we're joking now, but just wait. ...just wait.
If you think up any good noun/ thing pairings, we'd love to hear em. Some of the highlights so far:
Dogs in a Vestibule
Hams on a Sandwich
Jims on a Yacht
Steaks on a Flame
According to words and numbers we recently read, each new day yields 1,000 YEARS worth of surveillance footage! EACH DAY! Matt and I did some simple calculations and came up with the very rough estimate, that, taken the time when security cameras started to be widley used, and allotting for inflation up to the current 1,000 year a day figure, we estimated that there is currently over 5.7 MILLION YEARS of footage of people, products and parking lots. The record of human existence FAR outreaches the actual legnth of our habitation of this planet. This is a great untapped resource. Somewhere in there must lie something of interest, the only problem is we have to sift through 5.7 Million years of data and counting to get to it. So go and shoplift, they wont get to your part of the tape for a couple thousand years at least.
new friend, continuing to kick TTA's ass
Here is a banner that clearly insults Team Tiger Awesome that our good friend Debonaire Extraordinaire has crafted with insane skill utilizing MS Paint. Suck on that chuckos
Thanks again Ian!
Hey geeks, dweebs, squares, and cools and spazzoids, go check out the newest addition to the worlds supply of brain crunching jam-nasty salvation at:
Go to the thirsty section and watch the money come rollin' in.
Interviews with Beans, Joe Coleman. Features with Jello Biafra, Andrew Lyman (booyah!). Reviews, Contests, Ladies, Gentlemen, and MORE!
Thirsty Media is an online publication with monthly contributions from yours truly. Be there!
This dude:
Debonaire Extraordinaire
Is officially going on the record as Young Team Manager's Newest Best Friend!
This is why:
Hey Andy!
Just thought I would inform you that although it may be old news now, I've recently had a battle with Team Tiger Awesome (or not so awesome!). It was quite funny, I sent them the logo that you made for them and gave the code for. They absolutely spazzed on me, and I said something like 'Wow for a comedy group, you cant exactly take jokes well!' YTM - 3 TTA - 0. And then they took their vow of ignoring the problem. Just thought you'd be interested to hear. How are things in Chicago? Talk to you soon dude.
Peace,
Ian
And all this time I thought it was just us who cared about starting unnecessary fights with people we didn't care about! Thanks Ian. The "Super Special Awesome Friends Package For People Who Pick Up the Slack and Fight Our Battles For Us" (or SSAFPFPUTSAFOBFU for short) is in the works. Expect it to arrive in the mail with you next issue of Soldier of Fortune Magazine.
still more to ignore!
Actual bits of conversation, forcibly overheard while otherwise having a good day. All of these, to the best of my ability are direct quotes.
"No no. We can't touch other babies!"
"He was so fat I couldn't even focus on the fact that he was supposed to be Jesus!"
on the subject of Surrealism:
"Way to take a nice thing like art and screw it up with something stupid like the study of the mind!" (editors note: at this point I nearly threw up my brain and my foot nearly kicked the bottom jaw that was responsible for this intellectual Hiroshima through the ceiling of the building we were in. Presesntly, I am not in jail.)
"I just get so upset I just want to cry down tears of bullets!"
You and me both lady
Feel free to contribute your own brushes with mental death and we will gladly further upset the collective unconscious with their dissemination.
